Living a Bold Life After Sexual Assault
“I Am African & I Can” is a women’s empowerment blog that highlights stories of black women’s struggles and success.
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By Hadiatou Wann | 02/01/2019
As a teenager, Fila Antwine was sexually assaulted by her biological father. But she did not let that traumatic incident stop her from living her purpose.
Fathers are supposed to be protectors. When they become the oppressor, they leave the victim uncomfortable in their skin and emotionally bruised.
Antwine was 11 years old the first time her biological father sexually assaulted her. He snuck in her room while she was asleep. Young Antwine was confused and tried to convince herself that it was a dream.
Time went on and her father was indifferent. When he made a second attempt, Antwine was certain that it was reality. The man who was supposed to be her protector, crossed the line. She remembers physically fighting back.The assault went on and off until she was 13 years old.
Being a sexual assault victim, Antwine was crushed when she watched “Surviving R. Kelly,” a docuseries where numerous young women broke their silence about being oppressed by American musician Robert Kelly. “I had so much empathy for those girls. They don’t have to hold themselves accountable for his actions,” Antwine opined.
“When someone harms you, it’s not your fault. If you’ve been a victim of sexual assault, tell someone close to you. If that person does not believe you, tell someone else,” Antwine advised.
By the time Antwine confided in her mother, she was 17 years old and her parents were already divorced for reasons unrelated to the assaults.
Antwine closed that chapter of her life and turned to books and therapy as a source of healing.
She was fortunate to meet a patient man who understood her past and nestled her with unconditional love. They are happily married and raising two beautiful kids together.
“My husband was there to support me through my growth,” Antwine said. “He comes from a level of stability that I didn’t know growing up. I am able to be my most broken self and best self around him.”
Her husband, Jason Antwine, says that she is “the most caring and emotionally intelligent woman” he knows.
“Throughout my journey, I’ve been blessed to meet women who poured into me,”Antwine expressed.
And now, Antwine is pouring back into other women. She is more than a sexual assault victim. She is a brave woman who is intuitively gifted and moves crowds whenever she speaks! Approximately 25000 followers flock to her Instagram to get no-nonsense relationship advice. She is an Award Winning Coach, speaker and the author of “Strengthening Her Essence: A Woman’s Guide to Liberation Through Truth.”
Welcome to Antwine’s World
Mr. & Mrs. Antwine
“Love is being connected with someone who allows you to be your most authentic self while they encourage and support you to be better.”
Meet the Antwines
“‘Masterpiece and a Mess’ is a saying that I started from the idea that we are all perfectly in progress.Women are works of art yet we still have issues to overcome and resolve.It’s about owning that truth to empower our lives.”
“Even if you are afraid, prove yourself that you are worthy.”
“I’m just a girl from Queens who chose herself. My story may be different, but i’m no different from anyone else.”
“A strong woman is someone who has been hurt, but gets up every single day and gives it another try.”
(L-R) Antwine, her client
“When you start taking care of yourself, everything around you will change.”
Antwine created “Reclaim Your Power” in 2016
“I want to be a living example, and make a living while making an impact.”
Connect with Antwine:
Facebook: Fila McMillan-Antwine
Instagram: @sheisfila
Email: fila@filaantwine.com
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